Walking day by day

in this maddening 

saddening reality when 

you God used to say

many things 

and show me

what’s to come.

Presently you have me

in a space of uncertainty,

and thankfully you’ve 

blessed me with the peace 

that surpasses all understanding.


all that’s lacking.

Before salvation 

I was quick

to bolt, or quit.

And that landed me 

in a painful space 

times three:

mentally done 

with labels and fables

humans were able 

to be their broken see.

You’ve never destroyed

any of the ungodly 

you called me to 

to spark the dark;

you called me to, 

to bright the light.

That’s why I decided

to just land in the quicksand

of a padded mental cell

then you had the nerve

to take that away

and say it’s a 

decay of yesterday.

Fine keep it.

But why take away my pockets?

Now that I finally understand 

how unhealthy my family is

it’s time to flee but yet

there’s no money.

I have to witness

something I’ve connected

since I was a child.

When I was a child 

I didn’t speak like a child

because you didn’t give me 

a brain like a child.

I never asked for these gifts.

Or to be this ‘weird.’

I don’t get you God.

I don’t get why 

you made me so different

yet so limited.

My thorn like Apostle Paul.

Told you I was 

modern day Paulina.

All these ungodly pitfalls

are being executed by 

evil blobs that play god.

Like that woman 

currently with the man

you won’t 

disconnect me from, and 

you didn’t let me

protect him from

this evil blob.

All I was allowed to do 

was watch this cancerous show

in tears and fears to pray

this man wakes up

who knows if he did.

You pulled me out 

of that community that 

is no longer covered with 

your godly wings.

So many wrong spirits dwell 

in that space.

You God allowed love

to look so ugly for me 

where I don’t care anymore.

This world is a joke 

humans want to choke

and be in the toxicity 

of chaotic and robotic evil blobs.

Like that woman 

with the man you called me to.

Fine bring rapture already.

I know where I’m going.

I knew what Jojo*

just connected

since three years ago:

this man you called me

to is with a woman 

of destructive darkness,

that deliberately feeds

the purpose of fleeing

with the enemy by

pretending to be godly.

Anyone that stays still enough

can see the humans on Earth

that walk the talk 

of darkness deliberately.

But no one wants to be still.

Humans want to loophole truth.

Humans want to dilute biblical proof.

Like this woman with 

the man you called me to 

who got swallowed in the belly 

of this hallow follow 

wrong bow whale

in a wilderness for his deliverance.

No one cares to be aware

so I don’t care to pray  

by lifting my sword for

sleepwalking drones.

I’m done. 

Humans want to walk 

a talk of “godly,” yet

be the ambassador of evil blobs.

That’s on the “them’s” 

and their problem.

I’m done.

These landlords

that play godly,

that broken community

with no godly wings,

that play godly,

and that cesspool ‘ teaching opportunity,’

all sucked the life out of me.

None of these humans paid 

for all the ungodly ways

their flesh decayed in disobey.

The Bible in its entirety 

shows evil pays.

Yet none of this evil did. 

I’m done caring about

spreading awareness.

All I see is satan winning, 

yet your bigger than  

that dark ugly evil blob.

I don’t get why your called

are walking like slobs,

and fools as broken tools 

but that’s your problem

God (not mine.)

I’m done. You got that.

I don’t care to express 

what punk humans never confessed,

to help those they were called to help

like this man in this 

current darkness of quicksand.

You have that too. 

You allowed all of this

so biblically regardless 

if it makes sense to me

or that I disagree 

you God still have 

a purpose for all this

ugly mess. 

So that’s on you too. 

I don’t know why

you have me expressing

so candidly how over you

I truly am. 

None of this is a win

Humans blatantly sin.

sinning is broken societal winning 

worse than Sodom and Gomorrah

yet you wiped out those two cities.

Why are these humans spared?

Jesus died for no reason

no one respects or appreciates 

that mission or truly understands

the walk of salvation.

Many half-assed this walk

in a vulgarity of popularity 

and that’s not why Jesus died.

But again that’s on you God

it’s your problem not mine.

I’m done.

*names changed for privacy purposes. #TeamProPrivacy


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