I lay down the clutches.
I lay down the barriers.
I trust the blueprint.
I trust these movements.
I choose to fix my eyes on the Light.
Redemption is intentionality of my testimony.
I’m ready to defend him until the end.
I say yes to all of this and all of him.
Wreck me to reflect what’s not of this scene.
Remove the ugly and toxicity where
I no longer am stronger in this throng of wrong
thinking sinking tailspinning sinning.
I took this picture in total awe and wonder. Today I sunbathed telling you that you do the most God, and simultaneously falling madly in love with your artistic wonder. God I forgot how much I loved staring at the sky. I forgot how much I loved looking at the intricate details of your clouds. I’m thankful that my current circumstances pushes me to find productivity in a healthy way. I’m so thankful that I’m no longer fearful of having a relapse to my eating disorder. God you are healing me Your Way not my way. God you blessed me with accountability and iron sharpening sisterhood through my bestie Jojo,* and my other gems I’m thankful for. They’re both such hardworking strong women. One is creating her first dance show. The other one is building her culinary network working her butt off all over Canada and America. I’m proud of both of them. I’m so thankful they’re my sisters too. God you’re a genius. You use everything for your glory.
During that storm you God made me reborn.
It’s been eight years since I became alive in Christ,
I repent for the rejection of that night
where I had no sight or fight,
yet you took the wheel to heal and reveal
that Jesus Christ is Lord.
The Cross of Calvary set me free to be godly.
It took five years to switch off my gear of fear.
It wasn’t until the fourth month of the four day
in the year two thousand fourteen that I let go
of all that I know to free-fall in God’s unknown.
I’m so thankful for connecting with my newest sister. She’s so amazing, and we have so much in common God. I’m so thankful that you removed all the other women that shouldn’t be in my space. I’m just thankful that you aggressively honor having only your creation that belong in my space. I’m so thankful you’re honoring all the prayers that I didn’t tell anyone outside of Jojo, and one other person about. My heart is so filled after everything you blessed me with the strength to rise up from. I’m thankful that the past is the past, and I have peace about everything. I’m thankful that you’re shaking my awakening to go higher as being your called lighter.
The night in the car I thought I was going to die,
and you gave me a reason why to fight God.
You wanted to show me what’s coming to me,
but I rejected the gift of your prophecy.
Over the years you still meet me like Balaam.
And all your other weary vessels with heavy hearts.
You took my doubt, and used it to renew my mind
where I find all my reasons to fight in the Light.
Tonight, you showed me that I always knew
this painful truth, and the testimony laid before me.
I was tired of talking to your creation
as they lied and hide what’s really inside by pride.
I’m prideful too and it has to die, because it’s not of you.
It wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be, to see who you bumped me to see this past Sunday. That was a pleasantly surprising encounter. Bumping into my former pastor I served under, showed me I’m in a different head space. He is in a different headspace too. He looks so much freer and happier. I’m really happy for him, and I pray for his growth in you God. Anoint the crown of his head to always walk in the sensitivity of your Holy Spirit. Secure his breastplate with faith and love. Protect his helmet of salvation. And keep him armored God. I pray for protection over his family, and let your will be done in their lives, on earth as it is in heaven. Whatever you’re calling me to be God I say yes. It’s your way God or no way.
I was tired of playing dumb like a conundrum.
I was aware through my layers of prayers.
I avoided walking through this testimony,
but you used my running for Your Glory God.
I’m sorry I ran. I’m no different from the one
you say is for me, which makes us three strands.
Running is saying no too.
Was death attached to my selfishness hue?
I repent for my neglect and disrespect.
You say to trust you with all of this? I do.
You say he’s coming to me? I say yes & I do.
I’ll always defend & protect him with everything.
You say he’s fighting for alignment? I lift my sword.
You say he’s my king, then I’m his queen.
You say he’s my ribcage, then I’m his rib.
You say we are three strands, then we’re a ministry.
You say this storyline is about redemption?
Then I say yes to compassion, love, & forgiveness.
You say to be still?
Then I pray,
& I survive,
I say yes to this all, because you equipped me
to conquer all pitfalls in this supernatural free-fall.
You’re calling me higher, then I say let’s go.
I say yes to this call Your Way not my way God.
Redemption is here not just for the man you say is mine, but for me and all the eyes that need redirection by your protection. Thank you for the security of your Holy Purity. Thank you for the humility in accountability. Thank you for the saturation in maturation. Thank you for the glowing in your growing. Thank you for the straight path to my called math. Keep preparing me for this next level. I say yes to it all. Thank you for teaching, and reaching me to breathe with ease in the space that’s full of grace. Thank you for the peace that surpasses all understanding. Thank you for my breastplate of faith and love. Thank you for my helmet of salvation. Thank you for my armor. Thank you for your safe wings Heavenly Father.
I love you King.
Love your daughter.
*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy