Immobilized


she replays the days 

that had her crazed

in the rewinded minded maze.

hazed by the tears of her fears

she choked in her heartfelt provoking

emotions that kept her immobilized inside.

misguided by the layers in players 

from the fun in no sun building

that no longer has the godly wings.

she couldn’t be a secret or mistreated.

she couldn’t compete with the fan girl heat.

she retreated in the interruptions of her assumptions.

her misconception of deception is misrepresented 

by the tranquility of tangibility.

she’s tired of the realm she needs to dwell:

supernatural to her is a never occur blur

with no proof that makes her feel aloof.

she absorbed the brokenness of her surroundings 

as the staple of her labeled fables.

she’s renewing her mind to godly finds.

her parents are in their second quarter.

she’s in her first quarter: birth to thirty.

she’s been chasing the space of validation.

she thought a follow was the respected selected.

she’s been operating out of fear, because 

of the old building with no godly wings.

people around her didn’t want her to 

receive the achieving believing supernatural.

she surrenders her timeline.

she surrenders her blueprint.

she surrenders her expectations.

she lets go of what she knows.

she’s walking through the trauma 

of the submersion diversions of image.

she nitpicks herself and nitpicks others.

she replays the days 

that had her crazed

in the rewinded minded maze.

hazed by the tears of her fears

she choked in her heartfelt provoking

emotions that kept her immobilized inside.

misguided by the layers in players 

from the fun in no sun building

that no longer has the godly wings.

she couldn’t be a secret or mistreated.

she couldn’t compete with the fan girl heat.

she retreated in the interruptions of her assumptions.

she’s tired of those thinking she’s out of the league

of the space she was created to be in.

she believes her beauty faded but it’s untrue.

she became so fazed by the clouded sounds

of others lies that she’s their garbage deposal.

she knew that building with no godly wings

wanted sinning tailspins scattered stings.

she struggles from the deliverance in stillness.

she doesn’t want to be stronger in settling.

everything feels one-sided since the messages

in the Vicks of Birmingham lyrical bliss.

she allowed people to make her feed shame.

she prays away the pain that’s in vain.

she prays away the hurt with no worth.

she saw the true colors of others 

who she was supposed to be: fan girl.

she doesn’t need false friendships in her space.

she just wants worship and leave like the wind.

nobody sees her.

nobody knows her.

nobody tells her anything.

messages were received.

she casts out the projective brokenness of others.

others brokenness is for the Lord not her.

she chooses to see her new reflection 

of the woman of God she’s been created to be.

she replays the days 

that had her crazed

in the rewinded minded maze.

hazed by the tears of her fears

she choked in her heartfelt provoking

emotions that kept her immobilized inside.

misguided by the layers in players 

from the fun in no sun building

that no longer has the godly wings.

she couldn’t be a secret or mistreated.

she couldn’t compete with the fan girl heat.

she retreated in the interruptions of her assumptions.

it’s so hard for her to let go of what she knows.

she grew up in a household that was so cold.

her father is different and she doesn’t receive it.

it’s hard to believe she’s free from his toxicity.

her father was blessed with a clean bill of health.

she’s tired of hearing her ribcage is here.

she doesn’t see what she receives.

she feels no one understands she grew up

with healthcare Caribbean parents that said no

to her to socially grow and know her own flow.

people had the hardest time connecting with her differences.

because she spoke three languages.

because she took ESL to relearn English.

because she maturely understood not to 

pressure her parents for more.

she’s been fighting to fit in since she was born.

her best friend pushes her to be proud to stand out. 

she’s asking God for the push to stand out 

and face all the women and men she’s faced in the past.

she asks God to show her how to do this God’s Way.

she’s ready to let go of the unknown.

she’s tired of the satanic attacks that hold her back.

she’s praying for the accountability in maturity.

what is of God and what’s of the enemy? 

she yearns to learn how to discern 

from projections of others.

she replays the days 

that had her crazed

in the rewinded minded maze.

hazed by the tears of her fears

she choked in her heartfelt provoking

emotions that kept her immobilized inside.

misguided by the layers in players 

from the fun in no sun building

that no longer has the godly wings.

she couldn’t be a secret or mistreated.

she couldn’t compete with the fan girl heat.

she retreated in the interruptions of her assumptions.

she chooses to do this God’s Way 

and understand what that means.

she’s done repeating cycles.

reflection is her protection. Amen.

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