she’s learning that the pruning process
wasn’t the hot message she created it to be.
she finally sees the blessings and protection
from the defective perception of settling.
her King that makes her soul sing
pushed her to see she desires Higher
as standing tall conquering all pitfalls.
she desires to be a lighter of Jesus Christ
by being a lampshade walking as His Renegade. (Luke 11)
The past week has been mind blowing and such a blessing. God has walked me through healing from wounds I thought I pushed myself to forget, because I truly believed that I was going to die with those weeds—what a sad and broken live-feed. I now see, that I had a stipulation on the meaning of being set free. I now see, that I excluded myself completely, because I once thought that could never happen for me: “too much happened, and too much time passed—“ that was my blinding logic before being blessed with new mercies that truly set me free.
she’s finally ready to be steady in today.
she lets go of all toxic shows in yesterday.
she doesn’t know how her swing will go,
but she goes in God’s pendulum flow.
the contour in her detour was a broken score.
her highlights were strife plights in hidden nights.
her finished set was a mess that God turned
into His supernatural walking tangible message.
she had a lot of broken ideologies,
that blinded her greatly from fully seeing.
she leaves her visions in His hands.
she trusts in His perfect aligned timing.
she’ll wait to see what’s coming faithfully.
My church blessed me with two amazing sermons last night. The biggest take away was when my senior pastor at Hillsong NYC said, “It’s amazing what God will add to your life when you start subtracting.” I’ve removed myself from a lot of situations, and people I felt in my gut were distracting me from breakthroughs. I’m not in the most ideal situation, but this is the safest I’ve ever felt. I can breathe and be. I never felt this level of peace in my life. I want to hold onto this healthy oath to God’s Growth forever. I truly don’t know how to stay in this space in the event I ever have to face souls I’ve made in my head I’ll never see again. The great news is I don’t have to know. I don’t have to be worried. Crysta doesn’t have this. God does. I don’t know what God will do, because I’m not God. I’m not the author of my life. God is the ultimate deciding factor in any direction or decision I will ever make. All I know is that I stand on biblical truths, and I know who crowns this year in goodness. (Psalm 65) I know I’m loved and forgiven, the book of John reminds me of that. I know that God rejoices in me repenting in his correction, but truly beams at me being the path for souls that can’t see.
she chooses to walk in peace.
she chooses to own free.
she chooses to say yes to unity.
she chooses to forgive.
she chooses to be in love.
she chooses to walk in grace.
she chooses mercy and compassion.
she chooses to see souls as blank slates
His way not her way in Today always.
she chooses to look Higher as His lighter.
After surviving the last nine months [according to me, because that’s what I see, but] my King that makes my soul sing, revived what died so I can thrive. I know that I wouldn’t be who I am today if it wasn’t for these past nine months. I truly understand God has only the best for me. During what feels like spiritual preparation for His abundant pending birth through this divine separation, I realize there has been an awakening that cannot be shaken. There’s a supernatural clarity in my vision that no one can distract me from. I would like to see if I’ll be unapologetically free in His Great Name near souls that don’t believe. Even souls that didn’t believe me—if that’s God’s will to encounter again then I say: I pray I’m prepared to be His image not my own. I realize the eyes that need to only be alive is Jesus Christ. Crysta’s eyes need to shift to His gift of Higher as a Lighter and lampshade to be His Renegade. (Luke 11)
she lets go of the Crysta singular show,
she knows it’s time for that weed to stop
the clock of rewinded time in her mind.
it’s a bleed that’s unnecessarily scary.
she sees that her toxicity of me blinked her sink from we.
she sees thinking leaves no room for God’s boom.
she sees that she needs to be one in the body.
love makes her one in the body.
forgiveness makes her one in the body.
grace makes her one in the body.
compassion makes her one in the body.
she decides to die so He can soar Higher
with her being His stir, fighter, and lighter.
I’m done doing Crysta. I realize I don’t want to be anything other than what God has created me to be. I’m focused on Higher as being God’s lighter—no matter what. I’m thankful that I’ve made the decision to embody the Bible almost four years ago during my rededication. I practice to pray without ceasing. (1 Thessalonians 5) I fight to love like Jesus, and challenge myself to rise Higher as his lighter in moments that it’s hardest. I know I don’t always succeed, but thank God for his new mercies every morning. I try to remember to put on my breastplate of faith and love, as well as my helmet of salvation everyday, (Ephesians 6) but I don’t always remember to put on the armor of God—that’s okay. Thank God that Greater is He who lives in me, than he who’s of the world— (1 John 4) loves me unconditionally. Thank you Holy Trinity. Love she that scribes lines of poetry.