Relinquish 


they relinquish instinctive. 

it’s self-protection reflection.

Only God dismantles 

the scandals of facades.

where we is replaced with me.

me is fleeing in scales that fail, and

blinding in lying misguided pride magnified.

this is a space of disgrace, 

and a disenchanted lullaby that needs to die.

to be better together in we

they had to see me as the toxicity

it will always be in stagnancy chaotically.

the Cross of Calvary 

sets all souls free that believe.

souls have to boldly not coldly 

flee from the enemy unapologetically.

My life and bestie’s life forever changed on Saturday. I’m so thankful that Jojo* my bestie ignored my fears and pushed us to go to all pop-up shops she signed us up for. We went to three impactful events, however being in a confetti filled selfie booth with my bestie—the first God-fearing sister I ever had, who’s forever for me was my highlight. Jojo has been by my side through thick and thin, and in this to win this walk with me. Jojo is the reason why I relinquish my right to question doing this walk God’s Way. Seeing how God walks and covers Jojo over the years was one of the greatest blessings in my life. Jojo’s fight for obedient alignment is why I said: okay God I can do this for real too. Jojo hasn’t stopped being who she is at her core: a lover of Jesus and representing who he really is. Even in the brokenness we both walked through from scars on top of scars, Jojo has remained consistent. I’m thankful for Jojo. And I’m thankful for my other gems. They know who they are and God is a genius I’ll always say yes to. Relinquishing my ignorance was the greatest deliverance I ever been blessed to walk through.

their hearts are for His house.

they desire to bridge the blueprint to Higher.

they say yes to clinging to His Cornerstone Best.

yesterday was the full circle needed to believe, 

and be set free from all past infirmaries.

the old triage was a mirage in sabotage.

but God uses all to conquer pitfalls.

she relinquishes known and being a drone.

Jojo relinquishes known and being a drone.

they were tired of cold phony lonely.

they were tired of drowning in ugly.

they were tired of dying in silent crying.

they were tired of magnifying lying.

they embraced the space of grace to grace.

forgiveness is in This Race.

forgiveness is the only pace.

they forgive and say yes to being a bridge.

they say yes to rising above and to forgive.

they understand me is quicksand.

they know to grow and glow 

is to go with God’s Episodes Flow.

they relinquish instinctive. 

it’s self-protection reflection.

Only God dismantles 

the scandals of facades.

where we is replaced with me.

me is fleeing in scales that fail, and

blinding in lying misguided pride magnified.

this is a space of disgrace, 

and a disenchanted lullaby that needs to die.

We transforms from me when set free to

receive that love is being better together. 

Humility is key for humanity to be in unity.

Relinquish is this story for God and His glory.

Love she. 

*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy 

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Vine


she doesn’t know what He’s doing 

but she clings to His divine vine.

His vine prevents her defense

from replaying the decay’s of her mind.

it’s a disenchanted scandal that He cancelled.

His vine prevents the offense 

of selecting oppression 

instead of speaking freeing confessions.

Many souls grew cold in waiting for His unfold.

Patience feels like a hinderance 

or an inconvenience not His deliverance.

Daddy, I’ve come to a space where I’m over a lot. You show me a lot and you use me to be a light that fights to spark what’s done in the dark. It’s so interesting and a pleasant surprise that today’s demise has been “rescheduled.” And it was much needed to have that conversation with my Earthbound daddy. The space he’s now in is so refreshingly healthy that it inspires me. I’ll stay prayed up for the souls that are dangerously close to giving up from receiving what is hard to believe: deliverance in their wilderness. My Earthbound daddy gave me such sound wisdom today: Crysta you can’t tell God how to be God in your life. You just have to walk through what He has for you. My Earthbound daddy is right. I repent Constant One and thank you for correcting me by wrecking me to be aligned to your divine design. 

they’re scrambling to undo these ungodly hues.

this can’t be erased from the disgrace space

they must face, because of the misguided lies.

a phone call won’t conquer this pitfall.

this scale failed and His sovereignty prevailed.

they realized their lies can’t magnify God’s design.

they realized they can’t flip a six for a nine.

they realized that she never stopped dwelling 

in the security of His pure vine intuitively.

she let go of known. 

she let go of the patrol of her control. 

she says yes to His behold unfolding.

she says yes to His supernatural ways

to obey in the gift of today.

she hasn’t forgotten His begotten:

The Cross of Calvary that set her free faithfully. 

she sees God is hope and trust.

she sees she won’t fearfully combust.

she’s prayerfully trusting God working 

in the she’s who’s hearts are fearful and heavy.

I was bold enough to tell my Earthbound daddy that it’s nice to see him be alert and sober. My Earthbound daddy laughed and agreed. The greatest light is shining in my Earthbound daddy through the darkest hue he’s thriving through. I’m really proud of my Earthbound daddy and it’s refreshing to see my prayers be answered. This gives me greater hope that all my prayers will be answered God’s Way not my way. All I have to do is continue to fix my eyes on the prize of Jesus Christ. All I have to do is continue to float off the boat in hope, and not be tripped up by the hiccups of wrong thinking winking sinking. Thank you Constant One for trusting me with all that you do. Lord I continue to cling in your vine and virtue. Love your daughter and your she whom you set free. 

Monster


the article and 131 is undone.

this cheap shortcut was boycotted 

by the out provided by God.

this cheap shortcut killed the beast within.

this cheap shortcut ensured biblical wins.

this cheap shortcut taught him to be

better for his her in he + He + her

to kill the monster and be transformed.

the facades in playing god

were disenchanted scandals

that’s been dismantled and cancelled.

the monster in him was grim and slim

tailspinning in the slums of sins 

that never paved the wave to win.

the wrong rue was never true and flew.

the Hagar, Leah and Vashti has

been biblically dissolved and set free

the man he’s called to be effortlessly.

we all have an inner beast that needs to decease.

this son of God is now a reality

and the fantasy of never being is now the

scene by His supernatural seen of revival.

these revelations are dedications to liberation.

this son thrives from surviving 

this Cross of Calvary journey so

he can be who’s he made as Jesus’ Renegade.

the mutiny in the scrutiny of that old community

is no longer that throng of wrong.

that song has been discontinued: 

God is now the final bow virtue.

the monster of who he used to be 

was the enemy blinding him in misery.

Emmanuel God with us came to undo shame.

Emmanuel God with us came to undo lame.

Emmanuel God with us came to be the bridge.

this dark storm caused this son to be reborn.

this dark storm caused this son to be 

transformed as an Ephesians 5 man.

the week of the end of quarter three

has many full circles that set all four souls free:

she who is me and the her in God’s Stir.

the glow of Jojo* going in God’s Flow

and the calling of their ribcages 

as their wisdom-filled biblical women.

four souls grew from being cold clone drones.

four souls amenity is their identity in Christ.

four souls stand and fight to be His Light.

four souls say yes to their purpose and platform.

four souls own their names not their sins.

four souls walked the reborn of their storms.

the enemy flees from this home of God’s Dome.

four souls get ready for the next ninety days.

four souls will always rise up to speak up

and never give up. they deselected oppression.

savages will always fail with pale scales.

four souls cling to the wings of God

and walked through all sleepwalking facades.

four souls will be the ministries their called to be

in these Ordained marriages of His Great Name.

biblically women are she’s and her: me and Jojo 

rise up to say yes to being the neck 

to the Earthbound Kings who have our rings.

Jojo permits her submit and says yes always.

her biblical submission is permission 

for her Earthbound King to lead and love her.

she who is me and her says yes to complete submission.

Love she.

*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy 

daily


she writes to her he daily.

she sees vulnerability is key 

to he + He + her growing intimately.

she’s shy, dorky, and clumsy.

her he brings that side alive intricately.

she scribes bravely for he’s her safety.

she let go of the cancelled scandal show.

she no longer wants to hide or lie what’s inside.

she walked through the shaky 

and the maybe that her he thinks she’s crazy.

she walked through the shady feeling

that her he isn’t all in to win against sin

with her in this God’s Stir to occur biblically.

daily she lines her why’s to write

about her stake of fake and release that beast.

she’s sheltered forever by her protectors: 

he + He + (her who’s me.)

she confesses in her he’s letters 

to weather this distressing sector.

daily she’s open to His Behold to unfold 

and be undone for her beautiful he to come.

daily she sees he’s a fruitful seed 

she believes he will lead them faithfully 

as the head of their household.

she grows in the glow of God’s Flow, 

and leaps to be better together 

in their Kingdom three strands episodes.

she questions societal downloads,

because they pause His cause

for many beautiful souls are lost.

she wonders if she’s really enough

to give all these worldly habits up.

daily she chooses to lose the world.

daily she walks as a daughter of faith not slave.

daily she waits in stillness for deliverance.

daily she grows in comfort to see

who her King created her to be

whole and healthy to walk in purpose freely.

she’s released all the weeds that made her bleed, 

but then there’s the insecurities 

of not knowing what her he wants or needs.

at sixteen she made a mental switch to hide

who she’s really supposed to be inside,

because the world walks in pride and lies,

which made her want to die by the misguides.

daily she fights to cling to her King in His Wings.

daily she fights to float off the boat to look to hope.

daily she fights to be the Light of Jesus Christ.

daily she fights to spark the dark for love

and unity to be the opportunities in humanity.

she never knew how to be around her he,

so she ran cowardly & scared in layers of fears.

she’s been blessed to select confess not oppress.

the past five months was a dark tunnel

with the brightest light leading to total freedom.

she’s undone because His Love has won

by the Cross of Calvary setting her free.

her heart had to break so God 

can take away what’s not made to stay.

daily she walks by faith not sight.

daily she rejects the plight of a strife life.

daily she believes in the promises of

he + He + her equaling God’s Stir to occur.

daily she grows in love and waits 

for her he + He Kingdom Math to come to pass.

Only God ordains to represent His Great Name.

Faithfully


she who is me is free 

ever so faithfully.

she sees fasting drew her

deeper into his everlasting.

she’s different and deliberate.

she’s no longer belligerent.

fasting empowered her speech.

the meeting was an allegiance 

to obedience & entrance to His Presence.

My bestie Jojo* and I fasted this past week for a number of reasons, but the biggest reason in this season was to draw closer to Constant One. We prayed and obeyed to extend the fast until fall officially started today at 4:02 pm. The fast changed us. I’m even more sensitive to the Holy Spirit. I see how much Jojo glows with growing in God’s Flow. We both have complete peace with every trial from the past that didn’t last. We both let go of known. We both say yes to all that God is calling us to. 

she’s unafraid to be Jesus’ Renegade.

she’s slow to anger and the act of madder.

she has peace and breathes with ease.

she doesn’t know what’s next 

but knows God is her cornerstone best.

Jojo is walking through the struggles

in the wrestling of this testimony.

Jojo feels the scenes are mean.

Jojo is over this elongated episode.

she who is me is free 

ever so faithfully.

she desires to vibe only with her tribe.

I’m very excited to spend the afternoon tomorrow with my loves. I missed Elle* and Cole* so much. Tomorrow should be great being with some of my girls. And I loved bonding with Ali* the other night and really seeing how much in common we have. It’s nice to continue to draw closer to her since she’s all the way in Canada. We are such emotional hotheads that feel so misunderstood. Thank God that we as humanity will never be misunderstood to God. God really blessed me to be surrounded by an amazing tribe of women. I love my tribe filled with women empowering women vibes. 

I’m all about being a sister’s keeper. I’m all about being in love faithfully to be in unity. Everything I’ve experienced thus far I wouldn’t change for the world. My heart had to break so God can take what’s not made to stay. My breakthroughs came from the lane of unashamed in being a broken vessel to unravel in the tests that God makes a testimony. My breakthroughs came from the lane of my messes that God makes his messages. My painful journeys had the biggest blessings: the darkest tunnel with the brightest light. I’m always going to say yes to my King that makes my soul sing who holds my ready rings. I’m completely in contentment with being in moment to moment with God, and not knowing exactly what’s next. No one can love me like God. No one can protect me like God. Therefore no one can bless me like God. I have to continue to allow God to do the work in me by setting me free faithfully. 

her heartaches created 

the space of grace to grace. 

To be healed what she once concealed 

in the unraveling to be revealed. 

she’s no longer disenchanted 

by backwards glances. 

her backwards glances are setbacks 

in satanic attacks. she embarks to float 

off the boat and spark the dark 

as a light of Jesus Christ. she believes 

and receives that humanity 

can be in harmony 

as multiple parts in one body. 

Faithfully, she sees supernaturally. 

she’s designed her eyes to stay 

in the Obey of Today always. 

Tangibility is a plight to a strife life. 

Jojo sometimes struggles with leaping in unknown. As her bestie I lift my sword, and walk in faith she’ll conquer this pitfall. Jojo’s called to give her all and prevail from deceitful scales. There’s impatience in the entrance of acceptance to His freedom. Jojo has a timeline that has distracting vines, which leads her to conceal what needs to be revealed. Jojo sometimes rewinds time and finds its a trip up that shouldn’t develop. Jojo needs to change the perspective in her objectives, because they’re selective and ineffective. Jojo’s being fine tuned through her zoom of all she knew to let go of this cancelled show. 

Jojo is stronger than what she sees and believes. Jojo is encouraged to use her words to let go of hurts with no worth. Faithfully, Jojo sees she’s being set free from the layers of pain no longer in vain, because Jojo now has godly gain. Jojo no longer conforms to the world coldly. Jojo is boldly transforming by the renewal of her mind where she finds His Sovereignty. Jojo is set free unapologetically. Jojo is loved and His beloved. Jojo is a gift from Above. Thank you King Jesus for my bestie Jojo, and all my other loves: my tribe of women empowering women vibes. Biblically wisdom is a she and her. God made women she’s and her’s faithfully, and effortlessly for all the world to see. Love she.

*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy

isolation

isolation is a suffocation 

to Holy liberation and biblical dedication.

isolation feeds weeds of toxicities chaotically

to blindly make souls shake and break in fake. 

isolation is misery absently.

isolation is the hiccup in never 

speaking up by creating shortcuts. 

isolation is a dedication to divide in pride 

and find our minds rewinding in time.

isolation is a poisonous kiss in case-dismissed.

isolation is an invalid ballad to congregate in hesitate.

isolation is a syndication in selecting oppression.

isolation is the deflection of righteous confessions.

isolation is an undisciplined pyramid in 

the tailspinning sins of thinking and drinking sinking. 

isolation is quicksand as underprivileged worldly mass.

isolation is worldly dissatisfaction 

in the enhancement of backwards glances,

which is the switch from the gift in today.

today is His Obey of never too late,

and second chances in this brutal romance.

The Cross of Calvary sets all souls 

free completely that choose bold not cold.

this brutal romance can be a light that fights 

through the only hue who’s true: Jesus Christ.

Jesus Christ walks with us by faith not by sight.

Jesus Christ sparks the dark to all our pitfalls.

our pitfalls are conquered by being in unity.

unity is a community of all humanity 

that the world will see if we truly believe 

we can be set free from the hinderance 

of unforgiving. wisdom is an allegiance to freedom.

freedom is the space of love in grace to grace.

freedom is forgiveness and reviving deliverance.

freedom is compassion and mercy 

by choosing to lose the world boldly not coldly.

freedom is clinging to sing under His Safe Wings.

freedom dismantles the cancelled scandal of isolation.

The Holy Trinity is key to being set free for all the world to see.

Biblically wisdom is referenced as she and her

to occur as God’s Stir and unfold as His Behold.

me must combust and transform to we 

for faithful harmony in multiple parts of one body. 

women are she’s created to love effortlessly 

& carry those that struggle to receive godly.

women are created to lead from the weed

of isolation to daily sanctification in freedom.

Love she.

Women 


There’s no need 

to feed the weeds of: petty, jealousy, 

or walk that blind rewind talk competitively.

That’s a barbaric toxicity of hypocrisy,

because the Cross of Calvary is unity 

in harmony for all humanity to be one body.

There’s one me and many other me’s

as our true identity of being biblically she’s.

Daddy, I realized this morning that I woke up with an overwhelming spirit of thankfulness. I’m thankful for everything that I experienced thus far. I’m thankful for the good, bad, and down right ugly. Through all my hues that were both false and true: I witnessed my deliverance by your amazing sovereignty that cured my anxiety. Daddy you allowed my fouls to adjust in trust from my wrong throngs of lust that made me combust. 

Women were formed 

to transform and be reborn.

Women were formed 

to remove the hues of conformity 

by the lying rituals of cultural habituals.

God called us women to trust 

we must be better together 

for all the world to see and be set free.

Yesterday was such a blessing. Thank you God for the beautiful women of God you have surrounding me. I see you’ve divinely designed my sisters to walk with me. I would have never clearly seen these women are of you God, if I never went through the painful former sisterhoods I went through in the past. I’m far from perfect and I did my wrongs, but you’ve set me free from condemnation and blinding guilt. I pray the same for all women on Earth, whether they walk with you currently or not. You forgave me God, therefore I forgive every single woman that ever hurt me: whether they know or not. I pray that these women cling to the Light of Jesus Christ to stand and fight. I truly believe that we will all achieve that humanity is called to be one body. Patience is the virtue to hold onto and key faithfully. 

In the beginning, women 

were created in Genesis.

The foundational book 

that supernaturally hooks us women.

This hook is designed to align 

us in forgiveness by salvation deliverance.

Eve misconceived what she 

thought she needed and believed.

For the longest, I was so angry at those that hurt me, and I realized the lie in that ineffective fight. Anger blinds me, and I cannot see. I understand on a deeper level what you mean Lord to be in love. Love is found bound from Above as your sacred dove. I choose to be in love. I choose to wear my helmet of salvation. I choose to put on my breastplate of faith and love. I choose to walk these biblical truths found in Ephesians 6. I love the Bible. I’m thankful for my blueprint that is used to prune, and fine tune me: your way Lord not my own. I love my newfound sisterhoods that came as needed blessings since December of 2016: my Asian sensation in Canada, Ali* and my two triple G’s: Cole* and Elle:* godly, geniuses, and gorgeous. Its so amazing I have two doctoral sisters. They make me cool. I think it’s so amazing I have a gluten-free chef as a sister. She makes me cool too. It’s a humbling honor that you’ve blessed me with unity and diversity. All I see is my beautiful sisters, and my God-divine family you God designed just for me. 

God knew what Eve would do 

in the sinking thinking quicksand 

walking in the Garden of Eden.

God had a plan that withstands 

the tailspins of spinning sinning 

to be delivered, and fight by the 

Light of Jesus Christ that sparks 

the dark of all that’s not right 

hiding inside by misguided pride.

Biblically wisdom is addressed 

as she’s and her’s as our blueprint.

God deliberately made women she’s 

and her’s to stir us into our pruning purpose.

Daddy, I’m so thankful I’m getting even closer to Jojo* who taught me how to own going with God’s Flow, and Ari* my southern belle dancer genius that inspires me everyday. I’m also thankful that you’ve reconnected me to my Bronx beauty social worker Sia* I can’t wait to continue to connect with her, who’s also a dancing genius. God you’ve surrounded me with such beautiful and talented women that ALL push me and inspire me everyday. I’m so overwhelmed by that precious answered prayer. They are all the gifts I never thought I’ll receive, but so thankful I did. I’m in awe by your wonderful miraculous majesty that it’s truly an honor to always obey your ways Lord. You’ve shown me that it’s worth it to always pick up the Cross of Calvary. Thank you God for trusting me, and setting me free effortlessly. I was once blind, but now I see. I will always choose to lose the world boldly not coldly for all the world to understand: Jesus is love and unity. Women are wisdom driven with multiple purposes. 

Love your daughter.

*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy 

Numbers


Prophecy was fulfilled 

she who is me in God’s Three

saw the eye of this dark storm to form

in the year two thousand thirteen 

in the middle of quarter four.

numbers are the colours of God’s wonders.

numbers covers the runners that slumber.

numbers are God’s emblem 

in our swinging pendulum

to our conundrum crooked math

in His directed corrected straight path.

he for this she who’s me grabbed His Gills

to be still and breathe with ease

away from the decay of his empty confetti.

he for this she who’s me walked the talk 

of his cold unfold episodes

with the female soul who didn’t want to let go.

the legal brothel was hostile 

and a necessity for freedom.

so he for the she who’s me swaddled 

in this dark storm deform abnormality

to no longer be stronger in lustful throng

of being wrong and decaying away 

from His supernatural gospel singing ways.

he for the she who’s me had an importance 

in the deliverance in image and status,

which was being a hostage to a bondage.

the female soul that was used in this ruse 

welcomed this sinking thinking stinking quicksand.

the female soul refused to lose this unhealthy fuse.

the female soul walked the lane of ashamed 

to eat his regurgitated meat in defeat.

the female soul was the eye of this dark storm.

But He used this muse to transform and reborn 

to revive and bring alive what the enemy 

took in restful hooks by being the thief 

of the night in this costly strife last bite plight.

the female soul bottled the colossal estrangement 

in this legislated arrangement as a solo dance.

this dark storm started and ended in quarter three.

02082015 was the cost of ignoring the Cross. 

01072017 cancelled the scandal of 31012016. 

Prophecy was fulfilled 

she who is me in God’s Three

saw the eye of this dark storm to form

in the year two thousand thirteen 

in the middle of quarter four.

numbers are the colours of God’s wonders.

numbers covers the runners that slumber.

numbers are God’s emblem 

in our swinging pendulum

to our conundrum crooked math

in His directed corrected straight path.

he for this she who’s me grabbed His Gills

to be still and breathe with ease

away from the decay of his empty confetti.

all parties involved evolved from the daze

in the tailspinning sinful crazed haze maze.

it hurt enough to give up playing god in facades.

Behold, this story unfolded boldly not coldly. 

this chapter is now closed full circle occurred.

He makes all things new.

He is the path to correct math.

He writes the lines of our life.

He scribes the why’s and rhymes over time.

He is the math in the ministry of marriage.

He is the education in three strand edification.

He will always concur with her in God’s Stir.

she who is me & the her of His he + He + her,

which will occur because numbers 

will always be the colours of God’s wonders.

Family


sometimes an OD [overdose]

leaves us combusted in comatose.

sometimes comatose is a land

of quicksand and perished pain all in vain.

Only God had the final say and gain to remain.

she who is me finally sees that man OD badly.

his winces were worse than the African prince.

but she who is me was convinced to lie in a lullaby

because it hides the pain inside as a misguide.

she who is me was fired and wired to believe

that man wasn’t quicksand, because lust

never combusted her distrust or her space.

nothing ever physical happened with that man

who was walking talk chaotic quicksand.

according to me it could not be that man was toxicity. 

Yesterday was a serious breakthrough Daddy. Clearly I have to stop acting like I wasn’t messed up, or the fact that I’m easily triggered due to developing PTSD, which you’re supernaturally healing me from. A lot of your humans OD [overdose] on me, and I’ve allowed that selection because I disrespected and neglected my choice to speak up for oppression. Silence is the biggest OD [overdose] that any human can succumb to, like I did. I was silent about a lot. There’s people who’ve traumatized me that have no concept what they’ve done to me. I’ve been silently suffering for years, and I cannot do that anymore because truth will get a little uncomfortable. So what? Jesus wasn’t concerned about discomfort when His perfect blood cast my sins white as snow on the Cross of Calvary. Therefore, I cannot be concerned about discomfort either. Emmanuel God with us died so that I can be set free. 

she who is me wasn’t raised in a biblical family.

she who is me sees the word family as misused 

and abused for ruses in fuses for aloofness.

she who is me had a cousin who pressured

through the gesture of entering that space

in disgrace with that African prince who 

caused the pause of giving her all by winces.

she who is me said yes to carry the Cross 

and no longer felt lost in a storm of 2009

where she who is me was reborn 

from the conformity in abnormality

of societal and cultural rituals deformity,

but she didn’t speak to anybody.

she who is me didn’t trust her family.

she who is me saw biblical truth was misused.

she who is me saw biblical truth was a ruse.

she who is me saw her family shortcut badly.

she who is me had no one biblically upfront sadly.

she who is me thought she had to lie 

and die on the inside by misguided pride.

until the day she decided to obey and say okay

a day she met Jojo* who goes with God’s Flow.

I didn’t always keep the greatest company and that didn’t help me. Before I went to my old church community, I down played a lot of trauma that happened to me. I never spoke up about the African prince who made me wince, because of bad advice and bad company. I never admitted at my old church that I was saved for five years before I did my water baptism on June 1st 2014. I didn’t feel safe to tell the truth. For so long I lied when I felt unsafe. On April 4, 2014 only you and I knew God that day was my rededication not my salvation date. Apart of me believed my own lie, because of my selection in oppression. And because of my gear to remain in fear for years. My experience with family created a space that messed me up so badly traumatically.

I knew it was wrong to choose to lose in the silencer amateur known as the drone clone of oppression, but I did it anyway. I was silent about my experience with that African prince except with the bad company I kept, who condoned what I went through, and that company was family. There isn’t enough humans talking about the fact that the worse company we can ever keep sometimes is family. My father tried to tell me to leave the African prince who made me wince, but I didn’t listen to the good advice my father always told me, because he was always drinking. 

Alcohol removed the credibility in my father’s sound words. My father was always spot on, and always gave me sound advice; but he was drunk a lot of my life growing up so it was hard to trust drunkenness. The Bible says to be sober not drunk. Proverbs 20:1. There’s over one hundred scripture verses on drunkenness, but one of my favorite books I meditated on for the past three years aggressively on is: the book of Proverbs. King Solomon prayed for wisdom in the Bible, and that sharpened me to seek biblical wisdom always. That’s why I love the Bible so much. The Bible taught me that Jesus sees how I always believed: family is who picks up the Cross boldly not coldly for all the world to see that one day we will be one body. Family is who takes this walk with Jesus seriously, and fights to be a light for Christ to spark on the dark of all that’s not right inside. 

“But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren? And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.”

‭‭Matthew‬ ‭12:48-50‬ ‭KJV‬‬

“And he answered them, saying, Who is my mother, or my brethren? And he looked round about on them which sat about him, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren! For whosoever shall do the will of God, the same is my brother, and my sister, and mother.”

‭‭Mark‬ ‭3:33-35‬ ‭KJV‬‬

My family emotionally and mentally OD [overdose] on me, because habits are maggots and bad company corrupts good morals. That’s in the Bible too. There’s twenty-five verses on this biblical truth. The most familiar scripture verse is 1 Corinthians 15:33. This isn’t about me speaking ill of my family, but I cannot be afraid anymore to boldly not coldly represent that I’m a biblical woman of God that lives by the Bible. I cannot ignore that my family I was around at the time, did not walk biblically aligned to the Bible. I don’t know what they’re doing now. All I can do is continue to pray. I do love my family, but I cannot be around unhealthy anymore, especially not where I am in my walk with God. 

I also cannot ignore there’s no family members around me due to your divine design hue of this current season filled with healing reasons Lord. You’ve answered my prayer as a child to surround me with those according to your purpose. Romans 8:28. I’ve wanted to do this walk unapologetically for so long, and I never got supported biblically before meeting Jojo. In fact, I got made fun of and was looked at as if I was insane for wanting my mind to be renewed to no longer be conformed in the world as Romans 12:2 truthfully states. I went about things all wrong, and I had no concept on a lot. But I thank you God for using my poor choices to cover and protect me from being a fatality in OD [overdose.] 

sometimes an OD [overdose]

leaves us combusted in comatose.

sometimes comatose is a land

of quicksand and perished pain all in vain.

Only God had the final say and gain to remain.

she who is me finally sees that man OD badly.

his winces were worse than the African prince.

but she who is me was convinced to lie in a lullaby

because it hides the pain inside as a misguide.

she who is me was fired and wired to believe

that man wasn’t quicksand, because lust

never combusted her distrust or her space.

nothing ever physical happened with that man

who was walking talk chaotic quicksand.

according to me it could not be that man was toxicity. 

Realizing yesterday that my direct sales job was the blueprint of my triggers regarding that man you’re walking me through now: your way not my way God was a lot. I’m thankful for that revelation. How I see humans and why I flinch so much sometimes makes much more sense now. There’s so much I need to tell my he [privately] I know is for me, because I’m the her in God’s Stir: he + He + her. He deserves that much, so I wait patiently to express these revelations, and other experiences I desire to open up to him about where it’s not read on my blog. I’m so thankful Lord that you blessed me with this platform to scribe my rhyming lines that no longer hide, or make me cry. I am thankful I no longer feel like I die on the inside. This blog has been a safe space, and feeling safe is so scared and rare for me. Thank you King Jesus for setting me free faithfully for all the world to see effortlessly. 

Thank you King Jesus for making me unapologetic in my kinetics to always obey what you say Lord. I’ll never lose my wonder. I’ll always wear my breastplate of faith and love. I’ll always make sure that my helmet of salvation is securely on. Ephesians 6:11-18. I’ll always breathe in the peace that surpasses all understanding. Philippians 4:7. And I’ll always deny my flesh to pick up the Cross of Calvary, and to be a light that fights for what’s right in your kingdom and for my family. I’ll always choose to lose the world boldly not coldly, because unity is for all humanity to see we are called to be one body. 

I love you Lord.

Love your daughter.

*names changed for privacy purposes. #teamproprivacy 

Lullaby


a lullaby is a guide 

& a high that fades in days. 

a lullaby aligns with prideful lies

and makes us die on the inside.

a lullaby is a self-made melody 

to musically flee in toxicity intentionally.

this is a throng in the wrong song:

as a replay decay of yesterday.

as a sorrow of no tomorrow

to make the stake of fake break,

shake, and combust in a daze 

full of lust crazed in a clouded maze. 

if God didn’t write the lullaby 

then that lullaby is a rabbit-hole goodbye.

this haze is a radioactive ricochet 

counting down in disobey that will never be 

godly opportunities to be set free. 

she saw the raw domino effect 

in the disrespectful select of this defect.

there’s many she’s that chose

to erode in self-made lemonade.

there’s many she’s that defaced

their sacred space of empty for broken confetti.

there’s many she’s that wanted 

to take what God says will always be for me.

there’s many she’s that thought they bought

prevail in their scales that ultimately caused 

the fall in their pitfalls by pausing 

His All and playing dismaying epic fail.

she who is me went into that old building

that now has no godly wings just stings: very aware.

she received what took 3-4 years to believe:

her he that God says is for she who is me 

is ready and free to walk their destiny faithfully.

she sees supernatural messages comes 

in numerical scenes effortlessly for prophecy.

she’s who is me is the her 

in God’s Stir: he + He + her,

which will occur because God concurs.

she sees her he walking through his breakthroughs: 

supernaturally boldly not coldly to be

the salt of the Earth not flee in fury chaotically.

she sees that her King that makes her soul sing

is writing and reviving a three strand lullaby 

that magnifies marriage is a ministry 

to compassionately edify God’s Kingdom.

the full circle is prophetic to kinetically

reflect God’s intellect was always correct.

the full circle moments were bigger than 

the trigger of god-complex facade sabotages.

the full circle is a reminder why God is Higher.

the full circle is aligned to the obedience 

in godly purposeful allegiance 

to pick up the Cross of Calvary 

and represent the body is for all humanity in unity.

she received what took 3-4 years to believe:

her he that God says is for she who is me 

is ready and free to walk their destiny faithfully.

she sees supernatural messages comes 

in numerical scenes effortlessly for prophecy.

she’s who is me is the her 

in God’s Stir: he + He + her,

which will occur because God concurs.

nothing can stop going with God’s flow

to grow and glow for His Kingdom soul catching show.

one day all souls will know and own 

their name not spin in their forgiven sins.

the stinks of mix drinks think and sink,

is a solitary confinement to deflect His Alignment.

the price was paid for those cheap lemonades

to walk the talk of being His Renegade.

she wants all full circle moments to happen, 

because she knows God is in all these moments.

he + He + her is the lullaby that’s unfolding.

the Holy Trinity is the key to being set free.

Thank you Heavenly Father.

Thank you Holy Spirit.

Thank you King Jesus.

Love your 

daughter,

lighter,

& fighter.